Enamored Read online

  Then, I walked through the damn doors, and it’s like there was this magnetic pull. I knew she was there; I could feel her energy. I didn’t have to see her to know she was staring at me. I looked right at her, my beautiful angel, and wanted to wrap her in my arms. Tell her over and over again how sorry I was. How much I’d fucked it up all those years ago. Her being sent here has to be fate. What are the chances I’d hire the company she works for, and that they’d send her?

  Fucking Emmett Loney had his hands wrapped around her, and it took everything in me not to march over there and punch him in the face. Wouldn’t be the first time my fist has found his face. I was relieved when she left him on the dance floor in favor of sitting at the bar with Holden. I know he’s not going to try to jam his tongue down her throat.

  Every time she took another shot, she’d stare at me as she knocked it back, all the while Clarissa was trying to cop a feel. She was a mistake one lonely night after I had too much to drink. The whole time I was with her, I pictured Lana. I shake my head, trying to rid the memory from my mind. I’m sure Clarissa hanging all over me is what pushed her to feel Holden up and kiss him after one too many shots. The two of us already worked through that issue.

  She’s going to want me gone by the time she gets out of the shower, and if I’m being honest, I think it would be best if I left her alone for a little. I pull my jeans up my legs and snag my crumpled shirt from the floor at the foot of the bed. With a heavy sigh, I drag my sorry ass out of the cabin to get my head on straight.

  I step into the bright sun of the morning and breathe in the fresh air. There’s something almost magical about early mornings at the ranch. The hustle and bustle of the day hasn’t started yet. The birds chirp in harmony, creating a cacophony of sounds.

  I take my walk of shame, if I can even call it that, back to the house and help Mom and Dad with breakfast.

  “How’d last night go? Did you work everything out?” Mom asks, fishing for information.

  I fight the urge to roll my eyes in her direction. “No.” In an attempt to change the subject, I say, “She had a good idea about the new cabins, though. What if we make those smaller cabins for folks who want a shorter experience? They get to enjoy the all-inclusive part of the ranch, but for a shorter stay.”

  “Did she now?”

  Her eyes sparkle. Shit. I drop my chin to my chest and shake my head. That’s the same thing she and Dad suggested months ago when I told them I wanted to build some additional cabins that were split. I didn’t want to listen to their suggestion at the time because I was too wrapped up in my own thoughts. As soon as Lana said it, though, thoughts and ideas started bouncing around.

  “Let’s not talk about it. I didn’t get much sleep last night, and I have a full day ahead of me.”

  She smirks but turns around and busies herself with the table. I wave hello to some of the guests that meander over for some food and even convince a young couple to go for a hike to the spot I wanted to take Lana today. Hopefully, someone will get some use out of the beautiful hike.

  Just the thought of her makes me harden in my pants. She was so sexy last night. I’m not even sure she remembers what happened. She practically flung herself on me after doing one too many shots with Holden. She told me what an idiot I was for letting her go, and I couldn’t argue with her logic because she’s right. I’m the biggest idiot known to man.

  When I told her I was taking her home, she tried to fight me, saying she wanted Holden to take her home. Yeah, not a chance in hell. I’m not letting him protect her when I’m perfectly capable of doing it myself. Then, I got her back to the cabin, and she asked me to stay with her. She said she didn’t want to be alone. How can any man be strong enough to refuse a woman in need?

  I sure as hell didn’t sleep well with her right next to me. She tossed her hat and kicked off her boots before settling down into the bed. At one point, she complained about her shirt being scratchy, but she didn’t want her pajamas. I helped her pull her shirt over her head, my fingers trailing her delicate skin, goosebumps rising in their wake.

  It was the hardest damned thing to refuse when she begged me to kiss her—to take her. She was drunk, and I wasn’t going to break the small thread of trust I have left with this beautiful woman. She rolled over, giving me her back, and passed out. After her breathing evened out, I placed a gentle kiss on her shoulder and pulled her against me.

  I may have done the right thing by not taking things too far, but there was not a chance in hell I’d miss wrapping my arms around her for the night. I’ve had this fantasy since she first came to the ranch. She enveloped my senses, and all my thoughts ran rampant with memories of her. Touching her, kissing her, making her moan.

  Holden tosses a granola bar at me, snapping me out of my stupor. I snatch the bar from the ground and glare at him as I stand to my full height again. He has a shit-eating grin on his face.

  “Hey, Romeo. How’d last night go?”

  “Fine.”

  “That’s all I get? Fine? Didn’t see you come back last night. Those look like the same clothes as last night. Did the walk of shame this morning?” he eggs me on.

  “That’s because I didn’t. She was drunk, Holden. Nothing happened between us. We slept.” Even though I would have given my left nut to get any sort of action from Lana.

  I walk into the house so I can shower and get some new clothes on. Holden calls after me, but I ignore him. I lock my bedroom door behind me and strip out of last night’s clothes as I let the water heat up. The water droplets trickle down my body, splashing on the bottom of the tub as I think about Lana again. The thought of her has my cock growing to attention.

  She felt so perfect with her ass pressed against me last night. That, coupled with the memory of seeing her naked and kissing her tender lips, has me reaching my hand down for a quick tug. It doesn’t take me long to work out the pent-up frustration, and I moan as I coat the tiles with my cum. I drop my head and catch my breath.

  What the hell am I going to do? She leaves tomorrow morning, and I’m not prepared to let her walk away. I’m not ready to say goodbye. I haven’t gotten to say any of the things I promised I would say the next time I saw her. I haven’t gotten to apologize properly. I tried when she first arrived, but she wasn’t having any of it.

  I dress quickly, hoping to meet her outside. I spot her with Holden, holding a steaming cup against her lips, blowing on it to cool it down. I grab a bowl of oatmeal, a banana, and a bottle of water to intercept their conversation. As I get closer, I can hear her talking quietly, so I slow my pace, hoping to hear something juicy.

  “I can’t believe he would do that to me.” She sighs and rubs her forehead. “I need to start over, forget about the past.”

  My heart sinks. Too much time has passed between us. I really thought she was warming up to me, that today we could sit down and have a real heart to heart talk, and I could finally apologize for being the asshole I was to her. Make her see I’m not like that. Let her see me as she saw me when we were naive kids.

  Fuck.

  “Hey, Tristan,” Holden says.

  Lana whips her head around to look at me and winces in pain. She must have a massive hangover today. I hold the water out for her, and she takes it. A quiet thank you passes between us before the awkwardness sets in.

  Holden starts to slowly back away, and the sheer look of panic on her face makes me stop him.

  “No. Stay, Holden. I’m going to go check things at the barn. Wanted to make sure Lana was feeling okay.” I look at her. “Make sure you drink lots of water and eat a banana. It should help with the hangover. Let’s meet after lunch, and you can show me the new designs.”

  She nods. “Okay.”

  I leave the two of them alone, put my full plate in with the dirty dishes since I’ve lost my appetite, and sulk all the way to the barn. God, I really am such an idiot! There’s nothing I need to do here. Billy has everything under control, and no one needs a guide today. I think i
t would be best if I head home for a bit. Mom and Dad have things taken care of here. They would be fine for a few hours.

  What am I going to do at home? Nothing. I’m going to sulk there, too. I scrub my hands down my face and sigh. I decide to saddle up Gage and go for a ride. Riding has always calmed me and centered me. There is a quiet knock on the barn wall, and I spin to find Lana standing there.

  “Hey.” She wiggles her fingers at me.

  “Hey.” I turn back around and finish securing the saddle to his back. I’m not sure I can handle looking at her right now. Not after I know she wants to forget me.

  “I, um,” she pushes out a harsh breath, “I wanted to say thank you for last night. For making sure I was safe.”

  “Yeah, no problem.” I grab Gage’s reins and lead him past Lana and out of the barn before hopping on his back and riding away like a coward.

  Her designs are perfect. She’s factored in everything I wanted for the new cabins, just like I knew she would. Lana definitely has a knack for design, and I couldn’t be prouder of her. I made myself scarce for the rest of the afternoon. I told her I would be in touch with the office about getting copies of the finished blueprints for the builders.

  “You know, our company also does interior designing. When the cabins are built, if you need someone, I’m just a phone call away,” she says, her voice sweet.

  “Yeah. Great. Thanks. I’ll call the office if I’m in need of your company’s services.” I poke at one of the logs in the fire, keeping my eyes glued to the embers that crackle free from the burning wood and float into the sky.

  She sighs and stands in defeat. “Goodnight, Tristan. It was great to see you again. I hope everything works out for you.”

  I watch her retreating form and lean back in my chair. How did I fuck this up again? I try to think about what I did that could have been so bad. Okay, so barging into her bathroom while she was showering wasn’t my finest moment, nor was staying with her after the bar. Each time, though, she was willing. She wanted me just as much as I wanted her.

  Maybe Holden has some insight for me. The two of them have been very close since she arrived. He’s gone home for the night, and I figure it’s best to wait until morning to talk to him. Dad is sitting by the fire, and I stand and stretch.

  “I’m going to head home for the night. See ya in the morning, Dad.” He waves to me, and I head home.

  Someone pounding on my front door pulls me from my restless sleep. I need to start taking something for this shit. I pad down the hall in nothing but my boxers and pull the door wide open.

  “You’re a fucking idiot; you know that?” Holden asks as he shoulders past me into my living room.

  “Please, do come in,” I mumble, closing the door behind him. “Why am I a fucking idiot?”

  “You brushed Lana off all day yesterday, and then, you didn’t even get your happy ass to the ranch to say goodbye to her this morning. She was devastated when I dropped her off at the airport. I tried calling and texting you, but you didn’t answer,” he seethes. “You bitched and moaned about fixing things since she arrived, and then pull this shit.”

  “Not like she wanted to see me anyway. She couldn’t believe how I acted and couldn’t wait to put her past behind her. Sound familiar?” I cross my arms over my chest, facing him straight on.

  He snorts and sneers at me again. “Yeah, sounds like she was talking about that prick, Russ.”

  My stomach flips, and my eyes widen to the size of saucers. “W-what?”

  “Yeah, asshole. She was going to forgive you, and you fucked it all up. Again.”

  I sit on the couch and drop my head in my shaking hands. I can’t believe I did it to us again. “I need a flight to Boston.”

  He smiles. “Thought you’d never ask.”

  Chapter 9

  Lana

  Holden pulls his truck up and loads my suitcase into the back of it. I look out past him, expecting to see Tristan, but he isn’t there.

  “He’s not coming, is he?” I ask, deflated.

  He shakes his head sadly. “I don’t think so.”

  “I don’t know what happened. He brushed me off when I tried to talk to him yesterday morning, and last night the same thing. Did I say something?” Am I still not enough for him? I thought we were moving past that. The kiss, the desire pooling in his eyes each time we touched...

  My insecurities come back full force, and I do the one thing I’ve gotten good at—tamp them down. I am a successful woman, and I won’t fawn over a man who doesn’t want me in return. I’m better than that. This whole trip was a mistake. I should have insisted Eloise send someone else or come herself.

  I won’t make that mistake again. If Tristan does call back for additional work, someone else is taking the account. I really thought we were going to be able to mend things between us, especially when he clearly still wanted me—at some point anyway.

  I give Holden a huge hug and promise to let him know when I arrive home safe. I manage to choke back tears until I make it to my gate, then I can’t stop them from pouring out. I’ve had a couple of people move to other seats, but I did have one nice woman hand me a wad of tissues. I thanked her and gave her the best sad smile I could muster.

  I just want to go home and sleep, but my flight arrives around one in the afternoon, and I know Eloise is going to want the designs so we can begin working on them. It will only be a four-hour shift, so it won’t be that bad. Then, I can go home and curl up with a good book. I’ve tried reading a few times sitting on this plane already, but every time I start, I cry again.

  Gah! Get a hold of yourself, Lana! He’s not worth it. No man is worth this many tears. I pull my laptop out and write down all the things I wanted to say to Tristan but didn’t get the chance to. I thought he’d still be in the bedroom when I got back from the bathroom, but he was gone. Then, I hoped we could talk at breakfast, but he ran away—again. It’s like getting whiplash. One minute, he’s all over me, and the next, it’s like I have the plague.

  I glance at my phone for the time and decide to try to sleep a little. Maybe if I can sleep, I can forget about him. As much as I would like to, I won’t be able to. My dreams have been of Tristan for the past two nights, and I’m sure I won’t be able to get his wide chest, strong arms, or piercing blue eyes out of my mind anytime soon.

  “Hey, welcome back. How was Montana?” Dustin, my best friend in the office, sits at the edge of my desk and cocks a boyish grin in my direction. He has the potential to be a looker with his sandy blond hair and hazel eyes, but nothing compares to Tristan.

  I sigh. “You know damn well it was Wyoming, Dustin.” I roll my eyes but laugh anyway.

  “Oh, that’s right. Another state no one ever visits. Did you get the plans approved?”

  “Would you expect anything less of me?” I feign shock and place my hand on my chest.

  We talk for the next few minutes about my trip and having to stay on the ranch. I try to skirt the subject of Tristan because Dustin can be a bit of a gossip, and I don’t need that getting around. Eloise knows about him. That’s enough for me.

  My phone rings, and Hillary, the front receptionist’s name, flashes on the screen. I put the phone to my ear, expecting to hear that Eloise wants to see me, but she requests I meet her at the front desk. Okay, that’s weird. Dustin smirks when I shrug and hang up the phone.

  When I get to Hillary’s desk, the biggest bouquet of flowers I have ever seen is sitting in front of her. This thing must have cost a fortune.

  “Trying to rub in the fact that your husband loves you?” I tease.

  “Oh, God. I wish. They’re for you.” She smiles and raises her eyebrow, waiting for me to respond.

  I put my hand over my chest in disbelief. “Me? Now, you’re pulling my leg. There’s no one who wants to send me flowers.” I dig through the multiple colored orchids and roses until I find the small card. My cheeks light up in embarrassment as I pull the card out from the envelope and read it.
r />   Lana,

  I never meant to cause so much drama. I was stupid back then. I don’t want to lose our friendship over something that’s in the past. Please accept this as the start of an apology. I’m sorry.

  XX

  Russ

  My heart sinks, and my good mood sours. I thought for sure they would be from Tristan. The moment I saw them sitting on Hillary’s desk, my heart almost beat out of my chest at the thought. I put the small card in my back pocket.

  “Keep ‘em. They really brighten up the front.”

  “You can’t be serious,” she scoffs. “Lana, what’s wrong?” Hillary comes around the desk and tilts her head, watching me.

  My chin quivers, and I clamp my jaw shut, stopping the trembling. I shake my head and smile through my obvious pain. “Nothing. They’re too big for my cubicle, and I think they would look great here.”

  She narrows her eyes but smiles. “Okay, if you’re sure.”

  I nod and hurry back to my desk. I open my laptop and email the designs to Eloise with a note letting her know I’m not feeling well and will finish out the day at home. I all but run past Hillary and Dustin as the two of them talk, most likely about me.

  I take the elevator down to the parking garage, and when I get into my car, I sit there for a few minutes, trying to regain my composure. My phone lights up with a new message from Holden.

  Holden: Wanted to make sure you made it back safe. It was good seeing you. Hopefully, we will see each other again soon. What’s your home address? I want to send you something.

  Me: Sorry, yes, I made it safe. You don’t have to send me anything.